Lucky you…you found LOVE (Part 2)

If you remember from the February 3, 2014 post, Steve and Liz came to me for help with preparing for their lives together.  These newlyweds were in their late 30’s and this was the first marriage for both of them. As we reviewed the services offered at Favored in our “getting acquainted” meeting, we uncovered the true reasons Steve and Liz were sitting in my office.  Read the post here.

After our “Getting Acquainted” meeting, Steve and Liz began to overcome 2 of the main hurdles couples face when trying to reach their goals:

The 1st hurdle is dedication.  Couples must make obtaining financial unity a priority.  This means setting aside quality time to plan for their future.  This is where a holistic financial planner can come into play.  It is so easy to get caught up in the busyness of life that you continually put off the important task of planning for your marriage, family and future.  When you engage the services of a holistic planner, you commit to structured, effective time designing a plan to accomplish your dreams.  Combine this time with weekly or bi-weekly household meetings, you start to see progress toward the future you want together.

The 2nd hurdle is communication. Effective communication is key when discussing finances.  You have to work as a team moving toward the same goals.  Use LOVE as an acronym to help with effective communication.

LListen to what your partner is saying.  We’ve all heard the saying, “God gave us two ears and one mouth, and so we should listen more than we speak”.  But listening is more than pausing politely while the other person speaks as you formulate your rebuttal.  Listening involves focusing your attention on what is being said and ensuring you have a proper understanding before you respond.

 OOpen up about the experiences that have formed your view of money.  We unconsciously develop our spender or saver tendencies from financial behaviors modeled during childhood.  For example, if you grew up watching your parents live from paycheck to paycheck, you may be a saver and hesitant to spend as an adult.

VView finances from your partner’s perspective.  When you try to understand the experiences that have shaped your spouse’s view on money, it’s is easier to come up with a compromise that will make you both happy.

EEmbrace your differences.  There’s a reason you two were attracted to each other.  We tend to marry our financial opposite.  If you were raised to spend it all because you can’t take it with you, you will probably marry a saver.  Marrying your financial opposite makes it even more important to proactively talk about money.

Engaging my services provided Steve and Liz with dedicated time to discuss their finances, as well as an impartial party to facilitate communication.  The simple act of effectively communicating and creating a financial plan will have a profound impact on the dreams they will accomplish during their life together.  The plan will remind them of their goals and how they are going to reach them.  And I will provide them with accountability and help them adapt when “life happens” and adjustments are needed.

Do you need some help getting started down the path to financial unity with your spouse? You received some questions to work through with your spouse in the February 3, 2014 post.   This questionnaire is Step 1 of “3 Steps to Financial Unity”. Make a commitment to your marriage by signing up to receive your complimentary copies of Steps 2 and 3 on the home page of

Here’s to happily ever after!


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